Sportybrains

Most mornings I sit at my iPad drinking coffee and eating breakfast before my workout browsing the latest on my five websites I frequent. I confess one of them is LetsRun.com. While LetsRun is great for providing news and updates on major professional and college races, its message boards are, well, judgmental and harsh most of the time. I can't help but laugh at the assertions and arguments of people who probably have times that pale in comparison to the elites and teams they're bashing or gossiping about. Sigh. Anyhow, Kara Goucher, an elite and fellow Oiselle runner I have followed and respected for many years now got ripped hard for her performance at the New York Marathon and her subsequent emotional reaction.

Last Sunday I turned on ESPN 2 for their coverage of the event, just like any proper running nerd, and watched Kipsang sprint to the finish, Mary Keitany throw down a well-run race and American women unfortunately struggle (a total relative term for those non-elites) on the windy, hilly course. One thing that I find interesting watching the 26.2 unfold is each athlete's style and reaction to the challenges that are inherent to the distance. The marathon is hard. Very hard. While Keitany was the proverbial 'windshield' in this year's event, Kara and the amazing Deena Kastor were relative 'bugs'.

Deena, while seemingly disappointed but in a subtle fashion, blew kisses to the crowd and steadily approached the finish line, not meeting her goal time that day. Minutes later, Kara looked visibly emotionally and physically spent as she made her way to end what was an obviously painful and disappointing experience. For the record, I would kill to run Kara's time on her worst day, however, race times are relative to your ability and level as a runner.

Monday morning I saw exactly what I expected on the forums as I perused the digital train wreck that is so hard to ignore! "Kara Goucher is done" was one of the nicest things said on a thread about the NYCM. These individuals went on to say she's all about drama and money and her display of emotion was all to get publicity. Maybe this is true, maybe it isn't. We will never know, but does it even matter? No. What I saw was an imperfect athlete (as we all are) not being afraid to show where she was at that moment. I don't know about the reader, but I would be pretty ashamed and embarrassed crying on national TV. The fact that Kara even did an interview and showed a brave face in intense disappointment I found impressive. Sometimes we aren't successful. But that is how running, and life goes. We are biased and fickle when it comes to society's definition of a 'winner', and seem to have lost sight of just appreciate the battle within that happens every time we toe the line. Could she have kept her cool a little more? Maybe, but at the end of the day, I am sure she learned a great deal and was herself. I appreciate the elite runner who is not afraid to show that they are human.


Regardless of her intentions, Kara was first to admit that her race plan did not work out, she really didn't offer any excuses and was coming off a stress fracture. As a runner myself, a fairly passionate and competitive one, I know how it feels to bomb a big race- and yes, it adds extra sting when you make your goals public and put yourself out there. And stress fractures are no joke, having suffered five of them myself. Biased as it is, I admire runners having the guts to get back out on the streets after cracking a bone and going through the lengthy process to get back to fitness levels that are competitive. Comebacks are scary and they take time-for professionals the pressure to race for sponsors and paychecks makes the process sometimes dicey and on race day, we're left with what we currently have in the tank.

Not only are you physically fatigued and beat up after a long distance race, your emotions also tend to run wild because of the mental fatigue of focusing on your race plan and batting away the demons of doubt and remaining positive and on task. Sometimes we excel at this, sometimes we don't, and it sometimes is very apparent that we have not met our goals. I myself have cried many times because of this. Maybe I am attention seeking too? So what if I am. I recall from my bigger race failures that I was just too tired and vulnerable to properly regulate my emotions and needed time to process and decompress.

Also, I believe there is nothing wrong with reacting to a race performance if done in a sincere and classy way. Many of us put a great deal of emotional and physical energy into our preparations, and we almost have to grieve a small loss when it does not work out. The good thing is, however, that each race is different should we view it that way. All the work we put in, even if the result is sub-par for our ability is not lost. You simply recover, accept what happened, pick yourself back up and keep on fighting.

So thank you, Kara, for your transparency and guts to just meet the race and spectators where you were THAT DAY. To use street slang, haters gonna hate, and running is so much more than just race times. May the judgmental ones take note. I am not my PR's or race times, I am a runner. Sometimes I perform brilliantly, sometimes I get hurt, sometimes I exceed even my own expectations.

Still getting it done on 11/2.

This is life. This is running. It is not for the faint of heart, but that's what makes it great.

Stay the course.